How do you not just say “I have no idea”?!?!
Imagine my dismay when I hit up the Lowes last week to check out some seeds for our fall garden, only to find that they PULLED ALL VEGETABLE SEEDS the week before. Because they are idiots.
I asked one of the garden center idiots where the seeds were. It was a great conversation and I don’t want to deny you, my readers, the idiocy that is a central Florida home improvement store garden center employee’s FLAWLESS LOGIC. Here you go:
Me: Excuse me, can you tell me where the vegetable seeds are? I didn’t find then inside by the entrance where they usually are.
Stupid: Oh they don’t keep them out here because they’ll sprout or something. They keep them inside by the carts.
Me: (Long pause) Yes. I know. But they aren’t there NOW is what I’m saying. Can you tell me if they’ve been moved?
Stupid: They pulled them off the floor last week.
Me: Ok. Why?
Stupid: Well it’s really pretty late to plant things you know, it’s almost September and it gets cold soon.
Me: Actually, it’s coming up on a great time to plant, and it doesn’t get “cold” here for about 4 or 5 more months and even then it doesn’t get that cold. Also? Why do you have so many started vegetable plants out front if it’s too late to plant? You have shelves and shelves of tomatoes and peppers and corn and cucumbers and strawberries. It’s obviously not too late.
Stupid: Well they’re trying to push those plants then so they took the seeds away so people would have to buy the plants from us.
Me: What about all the things I want to grow that you don’t have started?
Stupid: What do you want to grow? Maybe we have some seeds coming in.
Me: (Long pause. Indignant stare.) It really would have been ok for you to say “I don’t know” when I first asked the question.
Stupid: (As I walk away) Well they used to keep them inside.
And then my head exploded. I’m still trying to decide if it was because of the heat or the stupid.
If I end up having to go to WalMart I may go back and murder that girl. And then I’ll probably get extradited to Norway or wherever the hell that chick is from, because she’s obviously not from here, where it doesn’t get cold until Christmas IF WE’RE LUCKY.
Haha, OMG, this is great! Guess she didn’t want to sound stupid by just saying she didn’t know…..haha!
(I just started reading your blog – found it from Harpers Happenings, love it so far!)
Jackie thanks so much for coming by! I hope you enjoy and stay a while. Plus if you love The Haps I know you’re good people ; )
This reminds me of the fact that stores starting putting up school items in the middle of July and took away most of the summer stuff, because it’s like it’s still summer or anything!!! That conversation was classic though, I mean would you have expected anything less?
My Joanns has CHRISTMAS stuff up right now. It’s insane.
That’s one of the funniest things I’ve read in a while! If you have a Target nearby, they carry veggie seeds all year ’round.
Elle I went straight to Target (we needed diapers anyway, not that I ever need an excuse) and got some. The next day? They closed our Target’s garden center. I’m not sure what this means but I’m convinced it’s a sign of SOMETHING.
All Target garden centers are closing. They are getting rid of them because they weren’t profitable and instead are focusing on getting food in at all stores — not just Super Targets.
ha! I think they stop selling seeds here in June but we still have our fair share of idiots. I’m jealous of your extra long gardening season.
HA! That is awesome. I love how the put experts in the store for your convenience.
I say you’re lucky that they even understood the question. I went shopping for cardboard boxes once because I was getting ready to move, and was directed to men’s boxers. So not helpful.